The parade was always the big attraction for everyone.
Worldly people look at the facade. Wise people look at the inner beautyToday i finished watching "再说一次我爱你"和"明明"
as usual, it's an old movie.
And downloaded few movies as well.
today have been listening to 任贤齐 的歌.
John给我的歌<<老地方>>,唱了<<她要我, 她不爱我>>..
很伤感的歌..... 但是确实像我一样.. (나는 유감스럽다)
为什么近来, 身边的人都生病了.
快好起来..
Today, my boss let us home early today because tomorrow is July 4th.
Came home around 1.30.. cooked my lunch and watched my movie.
Hehe..
Went to Ross, Went to PetSmart, went to Giant.
hehe..
i got my chocolate soya milk.
Did anyone know that i am lactose intolerance???
Hmm.. i dont think so
昨完, 看了"十分爱"和"后备甜心"
今晚, 看了"独家试爱"
也download了几套电影
"再说一次我爱你"
"明明"
... and others.
突然之间,我发现
以前的我,
都会很记得每一套和傻婆,朋友, 宝贝,家人和他一起看的电影,
都喜欢收集ticket.
突然间, 发觉近来我一个人看的电影.
抒情, 爱情,恐怖, action的..
在美国download看的每一部电影,
看了, 但是都是很模糊的..
哭了, 但是都没有月亮紧紧握住我的手.
笑了, 但是都没有星星的笑声.
饿了, 但是都没有可爱的猫陪我去mamak医肚子.
累了, 但是都没有你在身边的唠叨.
看了那么多的电影, 都不会记得内容..
可以重复地重看它们,
好像是它们陪伴我渡过时间一样.
记忆好像退化了.
是我老了, 还是它们不喜欢我了...
还有, 近来看的抒情电影都是,
几年前, previous year, 的电影
2004, 2005, 2006, 2007 的电影.
很多人都已经厌倦了它们,
但是, 2007的Celine才发现它们的存在.
永远是那么迟到的我.
很都人都已经感动过几千年的电影,
我现在才有开始感动.
真的有点讨厌,
那种感觉.. 永远是迟到的我..
连给家人的爱也是迟到的.
连给妈妈的按摸也是迟来的.
连给爸爸的鼓励也是吃来的.
连给傻婆的拥抱也是迟到的.
连给傻佬的关心也是迟到的.
连给宝贝的爱也是迟到的.
连给你的祝福也是迟来的.
连给他的关心也是迟来的.
连你给我的分享也是迟来的
连给他的门也是迟来的.
连给我流的泪也是迟来的.
我也是迟来的..
我知道为什么我是迟来的.
因为那是我选择的.. 我只有默默地接受..
就像我一直那么努力做到的一点..
嘻嘻!!我的努力是唯一没有迟来的.
不然我很早就垮了..
晚安!! Muaks Celine
i watched few movie today.
which i found out myself...
nobody shared those movie with me before..
Just cooked myself some porridge and some breads
Hmm.
it's all old movie from last year such as
<<十分爱>> . ... i liked it
<<后备甜心>> . ... i loved it
<<我猜我猜我猜猜>> ... i laughed it
<200> .. i watched it again.
there are few movie i want to watch..
but, i cant find them..
hmm.. i am still looking for good movie.
Can u all shared with me?
because i am not in malaysia..
hard to follow what's a good movie out there..
i wish u can share with me this tiny things or tiny experience.
i wish i am still in malaysia..
Hmm.. these days, i don't feel like talking to anyone.
Just myself..
I didn't go online as usual.
I didn't send sms as usual.
I didn't report anything as usual.
Surprisingly, many people come and asked me " am i ok?"
i was thinking..
"Is Celine too attached to everyone?"
"Is it the time, Celine step back go with her own life?"
Anyway, i am done with moody periods,
i think i will be fine today.
I figured out something and found out a ways to settle it.
And, i have my peanuts tang yuan for dessert today.
Somehow, i want to watch a movie which can make me gan dong.
I felt like the heart is closing up.
hehe.
Help me.
I slept well these days.
Just liked to roll myself with my thick comforter and lay on my bed. And, just listening to music and do nothing.
hmm..
It's so comfortable.
It's friday.I am so excited.
I fixed myself up today. Hehe.. Celine looked girly today.. hehe..
Everyone is planning the plans for July 4th.
I am kind of disappointed because i cant meet up with ojisan and koji for the celebration.
No worries, definitely i am going to indianapolis one day.
I always liked july 4th because it's the best time to see firework.
I think this year i will be in Washington DC, right in front of the White House.
Counting down for my July 4th.
I can't wait. What can be better than that?
I miss my firework.. hehe..
这个月里,
是第三次, 你在我梦中出现.
这次的故事很真.
在我梦境里,
"我们认识了十多年了,
这一次, 是重逢的时刻,
我们的样子都成熟了.
都有了默契, 也知道我们需要的是什么."
在我梦境里,
你坚持带我去吃"汤圆"
还是我喜欢的花生"汤圆"
我们来到了一家很古老的店子里,
你向老板聊了一会,
点了我的"汤圆".. 真的很喜欢"汤圆"
然后, ..................
都是很窝心的梦..
谢谢你!! 谢谢周公公!!
虽然, 在现实里, 这是不可能发生的事.
但是,在我梦境里,你让我感觉很幸福.
我真的很满足了..
可以说, 解脱了..
Yesterday, it was a fun experience.
We have a 泡泡厨房..
满地上都是泡沫..
很壮观的场面..
两位傻傻的roomate decide to wash the dishwasher for the first time.
They ended up putting too much dish soap in the dishwasher.
Haha...
So, 30 minutes later, i heard someone screaming at the kitchen.
"LOOK......... LOOK AT THOSE SUDS"
So, we spend almost an hour to clean up the mess and turned on and off for the dishwasher.
It was fun because there are something that we could laugh at it when we recall our time in
apt 101.
闭上你的眼我在你身边
晚安我的宝贝
微微的呼吸轻抚你的脸
此刻幸福洋溢我们的世界
在这现实的生活有太多的丑陋
感谢你让我遇见漂亮的你
我爱你小宝贝你是我的天使
看你的眼看到了我们所有回忆
没有疑问就是你让我实现梦想
只因为你让我明白快乐的定义
希望我们一直就这样在一起
什么也不能将我们俩再分开
直到永远
每天早上一醒来就看到你的脸
让我们一辈子来庆祝
我们拥有彼此
Hmm.. I realy like this song because that will be all my feeling to you
I wonder will you able to hear this song?
hehe.. 晚安宝贝 :*
The same question has been asked by my three sor po in 3 different days.
"Celine, How are you these days"
"I really want to know about you"
The first day was Phoebe Ng.. " She said, how is my ker wei"
The second day was Jeannie Lim.. " Jie, how are you"
The third day was Melanie Tan "R u ok?"
HMm.. 3 different days.. 3 differents ways.. 3 different sor po..
I just felt like i am so lucky because of faith.
i have 3 most important friends in my life.
As i told mel mel, the last few days i have been cleaning up my gmail.
I read about all those mail send from 3 sor po..
Those lovely picture send from 3 sor po.
Man... what can i say? i am the most lucky person in the whole.
i felt like no matter where we go.
our heart is always around..
we are always around for each other eventhough we are not physical there.
Dont you think that's the best? That's what i have been seeking for.
The true friendship.
We laughed together for every things.
We smile because we have each others
We Cried because we have each other shoulders to lean on.
We shared because we want each other to be there no matter what, when or what.
We learned from each other.
We scolded each other for certain things ( Celine always do that.. sorry.)
We supported each other because we know we are someone who can shared our friendship with.
What else can i complain?
Seriously, nothing i can complain.
Especially when i am so far away, i cant be there for yum cha, travel, birthday, hang out, movie.. and all those things.
But, you all never make me felt left out.
Never.. Not even onces
Most of my friends from USA know about my 3 sor po..
sorry, i showed everyone the picture of you all because it's in my purse.
Everyone asked me " How did you do that? "
Lots of people are proud of our friendship and our faith.
I know i have been saying that lots of time.
But, i am not shy, shame, bored to say that over and over again.
I just have to said
I LOVE YOU ALL FOREVER AND EVER.
曖昧是，比好朋友再親一點，但比情人遠一點。
曖昧是彼此有感覺，然而，這種感覺不足以叫你們切切實實的發展一段正式的關係。
曖昧是明白人生有太多的無奈，現實有太多的限制。你知道沒有可能，但又捨不得放手。
曖昧是有進一步的衝動，卻沒有進一步的勇氣。
曖昧是一方永遠不說，另一方就永遠裝作不懂。於是一方永遠沈默，一方永遠裝傻。
曖昧是，你會常常在MSN等他/她上線，每當他/她幾天沒上線，你會開始擔心。
曖昧是，他不是你的情人，但他似乎比你的情人更關心你和了解你。
曖昧是，天冷時，感冒時有一個會在晚上傳訊息特意提你服藥，叫你多穿點、蓋好被早點睡的普通朋友。
曖昧是，半夜你睡不著，卻可以放心打電話給他聊天的普通朋友。
曖昧是，當你遇到問題解決不了的時候，你找不到你的男朋友，或者不能問男朋友的，你第一個便會想起他。
曖昧是，每當她提及他的另一半時，你會萬箭穿心，但你也希望他幸福。
曖昧是，你明明知道問他你的愛情的問題會令他擔心、甚至會令他難過，但你除了他卻不大知道要問誰。
曖昧是甜津津又同時酸溜溜的。叫人不安，患得患失。
曖昧是，常常掙扎彼此關係。你怕透明化之後，你既得不到一個情人，卻又失去了一個知心好友。
曖昧是，見不到他時，你會掛念他。見到的時候，又會覺得還好。
曖昧是，兩個人都會互相猜度。他是不是已經暗示了甚麼？我是不是自作多情?
曖昧是，雖然他不是你的情人，但他卻會對你說：「你對我是十分重要的。」
曖昧 ~這種關係存在友情之間 , 是一種很特別的朋友 是一種默契的朋友...
不近也不遠，不多情也不無情...
暧昧是，两个人没有承诺过什么，虽然如此，你愿意付出的，比有承诺的情侣更多。没有责任，却很渴望去承担，不问回报.
很多人都问:
"Celine, what's sinian?"
"Celine, is sinian english or chinese or cantonese?"
我都会回答:
"sinian是思念"
"hmmmmmm.... ""嘻嘻!!!"
思念&sinian是"思念"给我的
今天, "思念"发明了 ========
S = Simple
I = In Love
N = N
I = I
A = Am
N = Nature
Anyway, it's all about.
Simple in Love N i am Nature (简单和自然是我的天性)
(Hmm.. the translation sound funny.. dont really like it but i dont have a better way to translate the message.. anyway, please bear with me.. )
Yeah, i want to be sinian forever.
Hmm..
找一個能令妳(你)微笑的人 ...
因為一個微笑就可以令妳(你)心情變好 ...
因為一個微笑就可以令妳(你)心境變寬 ...
因為一個微笑就可以令妳(你)心裡變暖 ...
即使再寒冷, 心都是暖暖的 !
即使再無助, 心都是甜甜的 !
你找到了吗?
It's was a sunny day Few of us, went to Washington DC.You said:
"We cannot force something
to happen or expect someone
to do something
when conditions have not yet matured. "
I said:" AGREED"
hehe..
Saturday.. June 16, 2007. 晴天
It's a simple day, i went to Fair Oaks Mall and get myself something.
The mall is humungous.
One day, i wish i could just live like others.
I know i can do it.
=========================
快乐的时光永远是很短暂的..
为什么我那么在意呢!
可能, 真的没有什么是永远的.
=========================
今晚,
和月亮聊天的时候,
我才发现原来
已经快四年多,
我没有和任何人argue in cantonese.
美国的天空,
让我忘记了
和人面对面吵架,撒娇的那个我..
那个对家人, 朋友, 宝贝,男友都有我的style
FACE TO FACE 的感觉
快四年了,
我快忘记了..
now, everything is in english..
我突然间, 我有点怀念.
speaking and arguing in cantonese used to be very 亲切
i want it back...
11.50 pm.
10 minutes more..it's going to be 12pm.
haha.
today, it's a wonderful friday night.
It has been a while since the last time i enjoyed my friday night just like today.
i didnt do anything special.
Just went to get some vegetables from shoppers.
cooked myself a bowl of korean noodles.
Make myself a cup of ice tea with lemon juice.
Everything was simple.
But, i am satisfied.
I am happy because i meet some nice people around who is willing to give me any helps i wanted.
Just like mom said,it's all blessing.
The friends from work, i think i could considered them as my friends.
Eventhough, we dont shared the same culture,
But, we have trust in each others.
That's all matter.
Celine, please go to bed early today.
No more sleepless night for u ya..
... hehe.. at least i try to..
Hmm.. i am suprised how could my co-workers became so selfish.
Well, i didnt get angry.
I just think that's very childish.
Very funny..
Well, i just wont do the same thing because i treat them as my teacher.
Never do that to someone else.
Today, i went to Wal Mart to get some stuff for myself.
i was walking alone in Wal Mart.
There are lots of stranger faces around me.
After finished picking up my stuff,
i was standing in front of the register,and my phone just rang.
It's dad. Dad called. dad called me i felt so warm.
We chat for a while.
It's like 5 minutes.
And, as usual, just like when i am a little girl.
i cried when daddy pampered me and i wish i can give him everything of mine.
sometime,i believed that a suprise call or
just a few minutes call from home gave me lots of support and energy.
I am seeking my internally with real soul.
Somehow, i am still waiting the call i am expected.
I know it's impossible ....
But, i am still hoping it's not a wish..
There is a big difference between love and compassion.
Love comes from feelings; compassion comes from wisdom.
Love is unstable and unreliable.
We may love someone today but not tomorrow.
When someone tells us that he or she loves or hates us, we would do well not to take it too seriously.
However, compassion is for forever because it is based on the wisdom that is part of the true mind, our original self.
9月10日
白色翠菊(ChinaAster)花語:誠信
花占卜:您平時不苟言笑，熟絡之後才會發覺您其實是個活潑好動的人，外表的樸實，只是一個表面的您。您對人很忠心，期望純潔的愛情，日後多點培養自己的內涵，必會遇到理想的情人。
花箴言:不要掩飾了，將自己的真性情流露出來吧。
hmm.. i'm feeling better
i think i can do it.
i just need to concentrate on my mind and soul.
Somehow, thanks for my jeannie,my remus, and my ojisan to be with me all the time.
Thanks for staying there with me.
because of you all, it make me Celine Chang
歌曲：你我他
歌手：康康 专辑：灰色调
半夜醒来的时候
你离他远走
四方屋里只剩孤寂
电话声响起
你在那里诉说委曲
关于他和你
我在这里一如往昔
说什么都没意义
我和你和他之间的故事
该怎么解释
我爱你你却爱他
他又爱着谁
我和你和他之间的故事
该怎么结束
我痛苦你清楚
他比我幸福比我幸福
你爱上一个不爱你的他
该不该等待
我爱上一个不爱我的你
算不算悲哀
p/s: Just found this song accidentally, and this song remind me of my sinian.
I guess at this moment he is sleeping or having sweet dream.
I know he will understands this song completely.
Hugs hugs. smile smile.
Take care.
Dont's know why Miss you at this moment.
USA TIME 4.33PM.
June 2nd, 2007
Tonight, i am not trying to pretend i am ok.
I'm not ok.
I'm somehow panic and nervous.
I felt why i have to work so hard for that.. i could have different ways.
I also manja manja.. i dont want to explain why.
just be with me..
i just need a shoulder to cry on.
But, you're so far away.
But, you all are so far away.
Well, it's time for bed.
Tomorrow, i will be celine chang.
Smile smile.
Another wonderful moments.
Hmm.. finally i left pocatello, idaho.
I am in Virginia right now.
The feeling being away from my second home is kind of weird.
But, i know it's another destiny for me.
May 28th, 2007, is a day to be rememebered.
May every living being,
Our minds as one and radiant with light,
Share the fruits o peace,
With hearts of goodness, luminous and bright.
If people hear and see,
How hands and hearts can find in giving, unity,
May their minds awake,
To Great Compassion, wisdom and to joy.
May kindness find reward,
May all who sorrow leave thier grief and pain;
May this boundless light.
Break the darkness of their endless night.
Because our hearts are one.
This world of pain turns into Paradise.
May all become compassionate and wise,
May all become compassionate and wise.
Hmm...
Finally, i graduated from Idaho State University.
2003 , i gave up everything just to come to USA for a new start.
I gave up opportunity to be around with my families, my friends, my love, and my career.
finally, i am done.
i fullfilled my dream and graduated from a university from usa.
That's one of my dream.
i had a wonderful simple celebration.
Lots of friends came back to town for graduation and the simple gathering.
we had lots of catch up. lots of stories to tell each other.
Yes, in two weeks, i am going to leave this place.
leave pocatello where i had been staying for 3 years.
i am going to virginia, herndon.
It's a big cities, fast-paced, sunny state. it is totally different from pocatello.
i have to challenge myself for a new envinronment, new life, new friends, new career.
sor po.. i will bring you gals around with me
and fight the wars with you all.
these days, mummy is around. she cooked bf, lunch, and dinner.
first, it's kind of uncomfortable because it has been long time nobody around to control and nag at me.
but, i know mummy love me so much.
she is so happy with my new job.
somehow, i felt i am kind of lucky.. because for international students it is hard to get a job over here.
pls pray for me..
miss you gals.
hai...
原来,坦白从宽是错误的开始..
外面的世界,
我选择了, 保护自我的形式.
原来,我的内心世界也应该是一样的.
我猜错了呀!!.. 笨celine.. 嘻嘻!!
我也会踏踏实实地保护我自己.
hmm...
I watched an excellent movie today
it's so real and it's really describe my real feeling.
Will i be the same?
haha...
:O)
Man, i cant wait for the best moments in my life..
Hoorayyyyyyyyy...
这次我真的有点气
虽然你是我的朋友
但是，我真的有点失望
认识那么多年了
我也知道这是你的性格和作风
可能是我小气了
还是我厌倦了那种方式
我还是不明白
为何你总是那么的虚假，
爱showing off
说反话
有时候，我在想
你是不是想要证明些什么东西
如果是那样的话，我认为你赢了全世界
我还以为我们是朋友，我们之间是坦诚相对的
没有竞争，没有谎言
只有真心话。。
我看我错了。。。
我觉得我可能误会了，但是那确是我的第一个想法。。
我会好好的调整我的态度。。
失礼了。。
Hmm.. today i was wondering.
How much does honesty cost?
If i have $20 right now, how much honesty can i get?
haha...
i think i am going insane..
Let me earn my 1st million first...
hahahahahahaha......
silly me..
Why.........
Why.........
人就是那么虚假..
永远不会说真话..
Everybody is...
Seeking for someone who is not like that..
:O)
你的爱很像泡沫
太轻或太重
都不在手中
我的爱就像天空
太放或太收
你都只是风
你来过却爱上自由
你出走我不问理由
我会好好过
等你再爱我
总有个角落
会让你想起我
我会好好过
等你再爱我
向右或向左
都有我站在这里守候
你留下很多
够我面对寂寞
寂寞不重
重是爱太多
我会好好过
当你回头
看到的一定是我
p/s: 可能, 这就是缘分吧!!. 我想你..
第一次, 听的感觉很无奈.. 心有点痛
歌曲：我会好好过
Although is only consolation prize, rm100,
but this is our frenship pleasure moment...
是我们友谊的见证，值得纪念纪念。。。 友谊万岁
~~http://203.116.91.105/haagendaz/pleasuremoments/index.asp
Our contest picture is here..
http://203.116.91.105/haagendaz/pleasuremoments/gallery.asp?page=12
Suddenly,
I felt tired of loving people around me.
I felt tired of caring people around me.
I felt like my loves and cares are not appreciated.
I felt tired maintaining lots of promises and faith.
I felt like i am just giving.
I felt like i didnt receive any.
Maybe i am disappointed.
Maybe i am wrong.
No matter what,
I need a break.
God bless victims from Virginia Tech.
It's a shocking news for everyone.
These few days, i received lots of phonecall, email from my friends and asking how am i?
Am i affected by this incident?
I felt so warm and touched eventhough i am so far away from them.
Last night, before i went to bed i received a sms from my thiam thiam.
He is the first one who send me sms.
He asked me to take care and be safe.
Eventhough, it is just a short sms from him and others.
It makes me happy because i know my friends care about me
eventhough i am not around them all the times.
And, My dear John, thanks for calling me in the middle of the night to check on me.
Thanks.And, i know you dont have to do that.
But, i really appreciated that.
It's a suprise.
Thanks guys for the loves and cares.
I really appreciated that.
God Bless Virginia Tech!!!!!
Hmm.. Hi Hi.. :o)
At my workplace, everyone know that whenever i appeared..
i always said " Hi Hi"
...
I was choking in my sleep last night.
Suddenly, i felt that i couldnt breath.
I was scared.. and i woke up immediately and went to the restroom.
It was scary, i thought i am going to die or something.
I think i am understress.
I am suffered from fatigue and emotional tension.
I slept the whole day during weekends.
Gosh..
Please... I want to be free..
Hilda是我的救命恩人.
She save me from an accident from a drunk driver.
我们虽然年龄相差四年,
但是,认识她的日子里,
她给了我很多的无形帮助.
看见妳那么地辛苦,
我真的有点心痛.
我真的希望我可以easy妳的痛,
看见妳哭,
看见妳彷徨,
看见你失望,
看见你和我一样的度过重重的难关
希望时间可以冲淡一却.
我们一起努力吧!!!
我很幸运因为我还有我的傻婆和傻佬们,
有你们的爱,
我会更坚强..
好久没和你们聊天了!!
想你们..
想你们的拥抱..
Y'day as usual a group of friend went to downtown for my friend birthday.
It's sarah birthday.
I almost got hit by this drunk driver, because he/she was backing up very fast and didnt see me i was standing right behind him.
Luckly, Hilda was screaming and try to put me back...
i felt bleessed, because if she didnt pull me back, i know i will be knock down underneath the car.
i think i just got my life back.
thanks, baby..
i really appreciated for saving my life.
Today, i saw a simple couple hanging out at the SUB.
I saw a guy lying on a gal's lap.
He was taking a nap peacefully.
He looks so comfy.
Suddenly, i told myself..
Where is my Mr Right?
(somehow, i know you're my Mr Right, but, i can't tell you)
Hmm.. i am being very lazy these few days.
I dont know why..
I just being very very lazy and i really hate that.
Anyway, these days, i have sleepless night again.
Counting my sheep every night..
It's close to summer time..
Am i ready for summer?
I doubt that..
I am glad that everything went so smooth and well.
i am happy for that.
Just need to relax and release my stress..
Eventhough, i had a crappy day y'day.
But, today, i met some friend..
they know that i am stressed because of the big events things going on.
My boss, my supervisor, my friends, my silly friends came to talk to me
because they know i shouldnt be treated like that.
I know there are still somebody who cares about me.
Eventhough, i am not american.:O)
I am proud to be chinese who live at a foreign country because i did it.
Today, i met some people acted with a shallow mind.
They thought they are better than anyone because they are american.
They thought everyone except american is dumb.
Sometime, I wonder why I am so far away from home.
And trying to blend in to the culture and custom for a better life.
I WONDER why I am so far away from mom, dad, and families.
I wonder why I am so far away from sor po and sor lou.
And I have to be alone so far away.
Today, i felt so lonely.
I know I always like to challenge myself.
I know I can do it.
I always stand back up whenever i fell.
But, I really hate someone discriminate me because of my skin color.
I am not stupid.
Hmm..
last night i had a wonderful conversation with jeannie and sinian.....
;O)
Very simple...
Just a simple chat.. sharing song..
sharing thought..
hmm.. and we all make a deal.
we said when we get old,
we will go to supermarket to kai kai..
Just all the old ladies and old man..
helping each other to get toilet rolls,
compare where to get the cheapest veggie,
pushing the shopping cart,
buying tau fu and cook a delicious meal onces a while.
jumping up to get the can foods at top shelf,
making loud of noise around ,
helping each others to get grocery.
people will stare at us," what are those popo and gong gong doing here'
hahaha...
i told jeannie, i miss those old days we always go to mid-valley, one-utama kai kai ya.
miss you all..
:o)
yesterday, it was the most scary night ever.
it was my first time, i had struggled through my sleep.
Having my laptop besides me doesnt really help me this time.
I always thought that i could handle my stress from work, study, and personal life.
I am good at handling my own stress.
unfortunately, not this time.
But, last night, i totally felt that i couldnt breath,
i couldnt focus at all.
i am stress and i am not happy.
i am worried because i am scared it will become of of the mentally disorder.
these days, i dont want to talk to people.
not even, my sor po, sor lou and my families.
i just want to be alone.
and dont want to see anyone..
joke with anyone.
hang out with anyone.
Somehow, i felt more comfortable when i am alone.
Maybe i am sick of faking myself in front of others.
CELINE CHANG...
HANG IN THERE..pls..
hang in there... pls
i am feeling depressed and stress
i have so many things to do.
i am stress
i need a way to relax..
你真的曾经来过我的世界吗？
如果有，
我为什么会让你离开我身边。
如果没有，
为什么我的心会这么痛。
你走了以后，
你的味道会慢慢散去，
你的样子会慢慢模糊。
我只希望，
你能留下一个东西，
让我证明你有来过我的世界。
。。。。。。。。。。。。。。。。。。。。。。。。。。。。。。
我有你的回忆。。
还有那模糊的味道。。
让我想起我曾经幸福过。。
谢谢！！
。。。。。。。。。。。。。。。。。。。。。。。。。。。。。。
Spread the love around by helping others
Please Join.. and it doesnt hurt you at all.
Early this morning, i had a dream about someone passed away.
And, suddenly my alarm clock rang , and my dream was gone.
I am half sleep on my bed. Finally, struggled for 1 hour,
Finally, i need to wake up and refresh myself to class.
The first thing i did was went online and see who is online at that moment.
I saw my sister caption stated" Your smile is always with us, we are regret we didnt see you, [Peace in Heaven]"..
I have that gut feeling something is wrong somewhere.
She told me our loved " Kio Po" has passed away .
She is one of the nicest old po po who always love us so much.
She is my far relative in our life. She took care of us when we were youn
Whenever i met her,
she always said
"Wei Wei, Sit Bao Mao?"
"Wei Wei, Hai Hao Mao?"
"Wei Wei, Sit Ha Beng?"
"Wei Wei, Oau Ho Lan Shui Mao?"
....
And, her warmest smile..
I was shocked.
Because i was just thinking about my grandma who has been really sick these days.
My sister and i were trying not to think about our grandma situation.
Somehow, i felt so empty because i really want to go home and give my grandma a hug.
Or just to be with her...
Grandma, Please get well soon.
We love you so much.
I went to the bathroom.
I cried while having my shower. I remembered baby said she likes rainy day because nobody knows she is crying.
I totally understand that.
Life is full with love.
Life is unpredictable.
So, please share our love to someone who we think is important to us.
And, never regret to show your love to someone special.
Rest In Heaven, Peace in Heaven, Qiu Po..
My prayers and thoughts are always with you... :O)
Mom is going to have a interview with the US embassy this monday.
I am so excited because i really want mom to get the tourist visa.
Well, i guess it wont be a big problem because she had usa visa before when we came to usa in 1994.
And, i asked my university to send her an invitation letter as well.
I know she can get it..
I really want my mom to come over to meet my friends, meet my american friends, meet my host parents. meet my co-workers, stay at my apartment, go to wal-mart with me, show her the usa university and others.
I just have so much to share and show it to her.
I know she will loves it because she always loves usa system.
I wish my sor po and sor lou could come to my graduation as well.
I want them to share my happiness.
But, somehow, it's not that easy.
Well.. It's ok... because i know if they were here.. i know they will bring me flowers and stand in the line.. waiting for me.
Hahaha..
It was my third year being a Alpha Kapp Psi member.
Alpha Kapp Psi is a business fratenity recognized nationwide in USA.
And, i would say this year was the most memorable year being a brother of AKPs.
I learned lots from all my brothers.
Without them, i wont know how the american culture and system works.
On March 29, We are having our annually 2007 Idaho Business Leader of the year at PAC.
This time, i am in charge of the banquet that night.
I have been planning this banquet from last year. It take lots of effort and time of mine.
Sending out invitation,designing invitation, giving out reward, and working with all my brothers.
Teamworks tell us eventhough we are still a student at ISU.
We can make it. we can be as professional as the adult in the real business world.
My budget is 8000USD for the whole banquet.
I am expecting 250 ppl at the PAC that night.
People been asking.. can she do that?
I know i can.. because i know i can..
I am kind of nervous with the whole banquet because i want it to be perfect.
I want people to remember that Celine Chang did a wonderful job for IBOY.
hahaha..
I can do it.,
Dec 9, 2007
二零零七,十二月九日.
是我们的宝贝傻婆的大日子...
她要结婚了...
我们都很感动噢!!
我感动地哭了..
因为是快乐和幸福的..
很期待我们的大日子...
又是另一个快乐时光..
但是，我还不清楚我能够回家吗？
昨晚，她很高兴地告诉我们那个好消息。
我们，三个都得意忘形讨论我们该做些什么。。。
好像我们自己的婚礼一样。。
但是，我一点伤感。。
好像快失去她一样。。
我真的很希望我可以回家。。
做婚礼的Super VIP..
嘻嘻！！！！
另一方面，我总是开不出口告诉傻婆们，
“我可能只是可以远远地和她们一起庆祝”。。
Let's Pray..
恭喜噢！！！
Love you forever..
Our sor po.. friendship..
Put a smile in your face..
ok..
There are few sleepless night.
I just turn on my laptop...
Let the movie kept on playing until i felt asleep.
Hmm..
somehow, i dont even know when did i fell asleep.
I just dont feel safe and comfortable for my sleep these days.
No matter how much i sleep,
I felt tired as well.
.....
I recall the moment we went to the top of the hill,
we sat on the ground,
we lied on each other lap,
we counted the sparkling star,
we drunk wine
we shared each other secret
we enjoyed the night.
I miss you all... :O)
Someone told me :::::::::
好姐妹,
不一定要不断的刻意的保持联络
但是最重要的是,
你心里面,
有没有有给对方一个全然的祝福.
I totally agreed..
:O)
This two day.
i am been so so so free.
No exam. no work.. nothing..
no text message, no email...
And all my sor po, sou lou, even sinian are very busy these days.
So, i am just all by myself.
Didnt really talk to them these days..
So, i am just alone.
Listening to music..
Watching movie..
Cooking my own dinner..
It's just very quiet and simple.
The moment with myself.
今天，Baby的婆婆过世了。
对不起，有时候看见她真的好幸苦
因为认识她那么久了
她的事情是一波未平，一波又起
但是，她坚强了很多.
My prayers and thoughts are always with you.
Hang in there.
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